The Misfits You And I

Sometimes I feel like one of those throw-away toys on Misfit Island with defects that Satan Claus felt wasn't good enough even for the poorest of children. We didn't fit in anywhere.

The one nice thing about humans is in most groups we form a family dynamic of sorts. Sometimes this is good, other times bad, and still other times it's something else.

I am not quite sure but my Mother received a steroid shot with Cortizone more than 2 weeks ago and is still going through attacks, etc. I remember in the older shots it would last this long too but always the doctors would say it shouldn't last this long.

This time though, it has intruded upon others to the point of madness. My Mother thinks she smells something even though the smell comes and goes and she blames it on something else every time. Now that the one dog is gone, it's another dog, no, it's the dust, no it's her air machine, no it's the outside so don't open the windows, no it's the smoke so smoke outside. It has been Hell on Earth to say the least the past two weeks and I have fed her so many meds to keep her at bay and still she refuses to go to hospital and be seen. She claims but not once has said what will happen if she goes that is so bad. If it were me or Jim or anyone else, she would've just called an ambulance like she has on me before.

All she does is rationalize her condition, blame others for her emotions and Jim's nerves even though he started shaking when he lost his job and long before Ricky was here. Everything is blown out of porportion to unknown ends. I do not know how much longer this will last or if I will blow a gasket they cannot repair. She is so fearful of hurting me in other ways but this is the way to my grave.

Not to mention, the only strong man in the house who came through for her almost every single time, she threw him out and claimed it was HE who was setting off the nervous feeling in the house and yet I've taped her since then having breakdowns and delusions, etc. I still hear them yell at each other, etc. But now they blame a dog they never see.

They fear getting evicted and yet they've never even received ONE warning letter and my Mom made a scene in front of the manager's office the other day. I was a landlord and she would've been warned THAT DAY, no doubt about it. Or the next day, but still nothing and yet she believes she on their hitlist.

Then again, she thinks doctors are cops even though she knows this is against the law. I don't know how much more I can deal with before I liquidate my coins and move out. My sister asked about my savings recently as if she still has some claim to anything in there after her abuses with diamonds, gold and gold coins not to mention a house, and more than a few cars all destroyed by her son and her.

This blog is all over right now as I feel so all over. I cannot write anymore. I must sleep. See you in another post.

First it was Baby in heat and how disgusting a Whore Dog Bitch that dog was. Rick and I loved on her, bathed her did what we could. Then Mom bathed her two more times. Still no improvement. She blamed this heat on Rick's dog being around even though he had been around many times before and never triggered heat in Baby at all and he was sexually mature even back then, so it doesn't hold water. But still, she was convinced, so she got rid of Baby. She said she was worried about how Chelsea would react but she didn't ponder it long before Esther was over here getting the dog. She told Mom if she changed her mind she could have her back if she paid for any vet bills incurred. As far as I say, she can keep her but even if brought back, she should only owe what she agrees should be done to the dog.

The Beginning of the End

It never ceases to amaze me the level of humanity we will never imagine much less achieve and yet instead we strive for the lowest common denominator. I don't quite know why people think it is so damn important they be the 'right' one in an argument or discussion, especially those based on opinion where no real truth exists, only supposition based on perspective. And yet, fight they will, not to mention kill. They will easily do that.

For example, every day there are several 'reality shows' I watch on a daily basis because I am just as bored as you are with this life and find the disgusting attributes of our race, our world, running so fast into the ground by eating poisons, sucking CO2, and pulling under the legs of the lifeguards there trying to save us from drowning in it all. I digress.

In these shows, they show every single day just how violent we are to each other, how much people are losing any thought to a line in the sand of something you just don't do. Some will say in the 'good old days', you didn't even talk about another person's Mother lest ye get decked in the jaw.
Today, our Mothers are wresting while their breasts hang out of their dresses and yanking the hair out of their daughter, daughter in-law, daughter's boyfriend, husband, etc., etc., ad nauseum on any given show on air today.

I laugh, just like you do, but by the end, I sometimes think to myself just what the Hell is wrong with people that they think this is behavior they can do , much less get away with or win on any level when they've degraded themselves just in their actions alone.

Maybe I'm naive and this is how it's always been. Of course, I know there have been even more attrocities in the name of God, Good and Greed in our sad history as MEN and WOMEN. What is wrong with us that we are so easily led to destroy each other and ourselves? I'll never know but someone needs to ask the question and demand answers from every world leader and all who work for them.

You will see probably many social examples in future blogs with me ranting about my fellow man, never forgetting my own part in this hypocrisy called humanity and civilization.

Also, I really want to talk about politicial and religious and sexual basis behind much of this evil. There are issues that will move people every time to something drastic and scary, depending where they stand on a given issue of Sex or Religion. Those are the things I was taught as a young child by my Father, a professional gambler, hustler, shark, etc., I was told straight out to never bring these issues up for any reason in a bar and ignore any invitation to talk about it. Also, if you hear it being talked about, move away from those people because more times than not, there could be a broken bottle or more coming depending on the place.

So, look forward I hope to what you feel and I can put in into words for us all. I hope to keep it up. I am very much the procastinator and it is hard to stay on the same thing but I am constantly bugged by this particular issue so I hope to give you some insights if you don't already know them and embolden those who understand what we already know so well. I will hold onto hope still, so forgive me now for my occasional optimism. It is non-intentional and merely incidental.

Hold onto your wallet and wear a cup!